How to Raise Your Stakes |
Written Words
ATTRACTIVE
| 16% of men say they are attractive/good looking | (12% men require 'attractive') |
| 22% of ladies say they are attractive | (4% ladies say they want 'attractive') |
Both men and women believe that 'attractiveness' is one of the most important selling points.
'Attractiveness' in another is more important to the men than the ladies. Feedback, however, indicates that many people, on meeting, don't agree with the other person's idea of attractive!
HEIGHT
| 16% men say they are tall | (3% men want 'tall') |
| 5.5% ladies say they are tall | (13% ladies want 'tall') |
Tallness in men is seen as an advantage. Men usually only mention their height if it's to say they're tall. They are right to do so, because many ladies specify 'tall'. If men state a preference in a lady's height it is seldom 'short' however - A significant number of men also claim to prefer tall ladies.
(Men can be very good at adding a couple of inches to their height, just as ladies especially are very good at deducting a few years from their age!)
PROFESSIONAL
| 13% men say they are professional | (1% men want professional) |
| 16% ladies saying they're professional | (13.5% ladies want 'professional') |
'Professional' is, unsurprisingly, more important to the ladies than the men - possibly because they equate professional with solvent
GOOD SENSE OF HUMOUR
| 13% men say they have GSOH | (1.5% men want GSOH in lady) |
| 8% ladies say they have a GSOH | (8% ladies want GSOH) |
I'm not sure GSOH means anything at all. Very few people never laugh and it's an individual thing. The men don't think a good sense of humour as such is a priority in a lady - though they are keen on 'fun-loving' - but the figures show men feel it is what ladies want in a man.
HONEST
| 8% men say they are honest | (5.5% men want honest) |
| 3.5% ladies say they are honest | (9% ladies ask for honest) |
Who is going to say they are dishonest or want someone who is not honest? It goes without saying and is unnecessary. Possibly people who have 'honest' as head of their list of requirements have been let down and deceived in the past?!
SLIM
| 7.2% men say they are slim | (10% men specify slim) |
| 16% ladies describe themselves as slim | (2% ladies mention slim as a requirement) |
Ladies know that slimness is one of the men's main requirements which is why 16% use the word, sometimes not quite truthfully. As I mentioned before, according to my feedback, many gentlemen don't agree with many of the ladies' claims to be 'slim' when they meet!
FUN/FUN-LOVING
| 7% men claim to be fun/fun loving | (18% men want fun/fun loving) |
| 9% ladies say they are fun/fun-loving | (9.5% ladies want fun loving) |
I wonder why so many men (18%) feel fun-loving is so important in a lady? Are they afraid things might get serious too soon? Only 7% feel it is a quality in themselves worth mentioning. The ladies are fairer - the same proportion who are fun themselves want to meet someone who is fun!
KIND/CARING
| 7% men say they are caring/kind | (7.2% men want caring) |
| 7.2% ladies describe themselves as caring | (15% ladies want caring/kind) |
Ladies feel that 'kindness' is a very important quality. Perhaps more of the men who say they have a GSOH ought to realise that 'kindness' is more attractive on the whole!
ROMANTIC
| 6.5% men say they are romantic | (8% men want romantic) |
| 1% ladies say they are romantic | (6.3% ladies want romantic) |
It looks here as though the ladies aren't quite romantic enough for the men!
NON-SMOKER
| 5% men mention they are non smokers | (2.5% men want non-smokers) |
| 6.2% ladies say they are non-smokers | (9% ladies want non-smoker) |
Very few people indeed mention if they are a smoker unless prompted to do so (as in Grapevine), and similarly in my sample I could find nobody requesting specifically to meet a smoker.
Smoking is slightly more of an issue with the ladies than with the men.
BLONDE
| 17% ladies describe themselves as blonde | (1% men request blonde) |
Ladies obviously believe that 'gentlemen prefer blondes'! They may be right, but surprisingly very few men actually specified blonde in their ad. Blondes tend to mention their hair colour more than non-blondes.
SINGLE MUM
| 16% ladies say they are a single parent/mum | (3% men say single mums OK - though many more don't mention it one way or the other) |
N.B. Many single parents use the newspaper ad. method of meeting a man, mainly because it's affordable for them. I have spoken to several social workers over the years who deal with abused children. It's a recognised fact that paediophiles use the newspaper method of meeting mothers with children.
I don't speak for Dating Agencies like Grapevine here, where names and addresses of all members are held and members are traceable and accountable. In a newspaper advert, or internet dating agency, for safety, my advice is for single mothers not to mention young chldren in their ad., but to tell the man after he has made contact and risk being turned down if a man doesn't want to meet a lady with children. This is one case where omission is justified.
YOUNG LOOKING
| 8% men describe themselves as young looking/young for age, "60 going on 40" etc. |
| 5% ladies describe themselves as young looking/young for age, "50 years young" etc. |
A figure which doesn't add up:
7% of men will only meet ladies very significantly younger than themselves, but only 2.7% ladies want to meet men that much older than themselves.
All the fun's in how you say a thing' -Robert Fox
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